2005-04-28

I am ICHIBAN!

I posted a while ago about a H_lk Hogan manga I bought in a convenience store. Turns out it's the greatest comic book -- no, greatest book, period -- in the history of literature. Don't ask how I got access to a scanner, but I did, and now I can share some of my favorite H_lkamania moments with you. The artist here is HARADA Kunichika (原田久仁信) and the writer is KAJIWARA Ikki (梶原一騎)*.

The man himself, slapping his ass. Those sound effects are pan pan, which is the sound of spanking, so you know I'm not lying. I am omitting context, I admit. But is any really needed?

Andre the Giant grabs Hogan by the face. Hogan looks like he is thinking about a place long ago and far away.

Hogan gets a weird face-noogie from a masked wrestler whose name I forget. "Super K" or something. But don't worry...

... before long he turns the tables and defeats Super K by calling on his magical computer, Synergy, to transform him into glamorous rock star JEM!

One of my favorites. Hogan wakes in terror from a nightmare about his rival Stan's "Western Lariat" move, which is like punching somebody except you do it with the side of your forearm. Plausible!

At one point in the story, Hogan meets this terrifying being, probably an alien, wearing a cheap, lumpy Sylvester Stall_ne apparatus. He plays along with the fake Sly and scores his legendary role as "Thunderlips" in Rocky III. Which involves...

... dressing like a pimp, except pantsless, and then coming face-to-face with his greatest fear:

Women.

* Who is more famous for writing the legendary 『巨人の星』 (Kyojin no Hoshi, "Star of the [Yomiuri] Giants"), in which alcoholism and domestic violence are romanticised while foreigners are depicted as savage brutes. Baseball-playing brutes.

Popularity factor: 7

Anonymous:

I can't see the images, but boy do I want to.


Wyatt:

Matt, how do they translate the phrase "Watcha gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?!" into Japanese?An outstanding looking book if ever I've seen one.


Zusty:

Oh my lord. That is really, really something.


Psychbloke:

Say, Sly put on a few pounds there.......


Anonymous:

Ah, Matt, the images work on the main page but not in the archive. Relative addresses, probably.

-- Tim May


Matt:

D'oh! Sorry, anonymous, and thanks Tim. Should be OK now.

Wyatt, these books sadly do not feature a recognisable instance of "Whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?!". But he does keep saying "I AM ICHIBAN" (アイ・アム・一番!) which means "I AM NUMBER ONE!", and people in fight scenes keep saying "Kill you!" (キル・ユー!), which we are to interpret as "I will kill you!".

PB: I tell you, that's not Sly!


Wyatt:

I think it is Sly, but the artist must have only had access to photos of Sly while he was bulked up from the god awful, Copland.

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