There comes a time in every man's life when he must go to the Meguro Parasitological Museum. For me, that time was today.

The web is full of blog posts and travel guides detailing the many grotesque wonders lurking in the MPM's formaldehyde, so I won't repeat it all. But I will say there were some crazy old books in there, and in the gift shop I bought a copy of 『寄生虫博士の中国トイレ旅行記』 ("Toilets in China: a Parasitologist's Travels", maybe), by SUZUKI Noriji, which looks like just the thing to keep me out here on the archipelago forever. (Or at least until they get those superatmospheric rocket planes working so that I can duck back to Japan when nature calls.)

Probably the single most disturbing thing about that whole place was a picture someone had drawn in the guestbook, of Doraemon with an alarmingly large worm coming out of his rear end. (No, I lie. The single most disturbing thing was a particular photo on the second floor, and I imagine that everyone who has been to the MPM knows exactly the photo I mean.)